Who’s Who?

- There’s a letter from Cardiff on the table in the hall.
- Oh yeah.
- Yep.
- It’s for you.
- Thanks.
- Aren’t you going to open it then?
- Later.
- Oh! Right.
- How was it today?
- What? Work?
- Yep, you know, how was your day?
- Fine, and you?
- Quiet, boring.
- Never mind.
- I was wondering, you know, fancy a drink, tonight?
- Tonight? OK then, where did you think of going?
- Just up the pub.
- The Butcher’s?
- If you like.
- All right. Have you made any food?
- Got some pizza in the oven.
- Lovely.
- So, did you have any bother?
- What do you mean?
- Did you have any bother in work? You know, you said the other day that that bloke was mucking you about; the new supervisor.
- Oh, him, no, no bother with him, I just overreacted, you know.
- Oh.
- Well, how long have I got?
- Uh? Oh, for food. You mean, when’s the pizza going to be ready.
- Yeah.
- Half an hour.
- Got time for a shower then.
- I suppose.
- What’s the matter with you?
- What do you mean?
- You’re very sullen.
- I’m not.
- Right, see you in a bit then.
- The water’s warm, you could have a bath, if you want.
- Did you get bubbles?
- I’ve been working, and cooking.
- It’s all right. I wasn’t . . . . .
- It doesn’t stop, does it? I really have been working you know.
- I never said . . .
- Sorry.
- I’d better get on with it then.
- OK. Oh, your mother phoned.
- What did she want?
- Don’t know, didn’t ask.
- You weren’t horrible to her, were you?
- She thought you had a day off. She didn’t seem to want to talk to me at all.
- Well, you can’t blame her, after what you did.
- How much did you tell her?
- I’ve got no-one else to talk to.
- What about me?
- You – are the problem.
- Who do you know in Cardiff then?
- I bet that’s been bugging you all day, it’s a wonder you didn’t try to steam it open.
- Just wondering.
- You don’t trust me, do you?
- Well . . .
- Look, I can’t help it if you haven’t got a life.
- But I have, I work from home now, you know that.
- Look, I really need that shower.
- Sorry, you go ahead.
- Thank you very much sir.
- No need to be so sarcastic.
- You’d better check that pizza.
- It’s all right, the oven’s on very low, I spent a lot of time on that pizza, I’m not going to ruin it now. It’s a very complicated process, making it from scratch, no wonder people just pick up the phone.
- I didn’t ask you to make food for me; I don’t even like pizza that much.
- Excuse me.
- Sorry.
- Are you all right?
- I’m tired.
- Had a long day?
- Yes, I suppose so.
- Never mind, have a long soak in the bath.
- What about the pizza?
- It can wait.
- Thanks.
- I love you.
- I know.

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Heads or Tails?

Heads-or-tailsBranwen is an A* pupil who has been offered university places at both Oxford and Cambridge. She’s agonised for days about which one to choose. She’s weighed up all the pros and cons and it’s pretty much 50-50.

She decides to flip a coin. If it comes up heads she will choose Oxford; if it’s tails Cambridge will have the privilege of her attendance.

In a parallel universe a Branwen who is identical in every respect down to the last sub-atomic particle has, of course, exactly the same dilemma, and does, of course, exactly the same thing.

This scenario is not science fiction but is based on theories that are taken very seriously by very serious scientists

The Branwens in both universes flip their respective coins. Remember, they are exactly the same. Every thought, every emotion, every breath is exactly the same for each of them. Since there is not a sub-atomic particle of difference between them they are, in effect, exactly the same person.

The coin spins in the air and clatters to the floor of the little coffee shop where Branwen’s working for the summer holidays. She leans down to look more closely at the coin, supporting the small of her back, it’s still sore after the fall from her bike yesterday.

The coin lands heads side up in one universe and tails side up in the other. Now we have two versions of Branwen. Branwen A heads to Oxford while Branwen B takes up residence in Cambridge.

Branwen B loves Cambridge and settles in straight away. In her third year she meets Joseph, a politics student. They fall in love and get married. Joseph wants to devote himself to a political career. Branwen gives him the emotional and financial support he needs to do it.

Ten years later Joseph becomes a Member of Parliament and over the next twenty years ascends the political ladder until he becomes Prime Minister.

Branwen A can’t settle down in Oxford and drinks too much alcohol for her own good. She skips lectures, neglects her coursework and misses exams. In her third year she is asked to leave.

Branwen A goes back to her home town suffering from a breakdown and lives the rest of her life dependent on medication and benefits. Joseph meanwhile, loses interest in politics and becomes a corporate lawyer.

Now, along the way both Branwens make thousands of choices, for example, whether to get a bus to the market or cycle, or whether to wear the red or the green coat. You could say that every time Branwen makes a decision a parallel universe version of Branwen makes a different decision.

This leads me to conclude that if you’re sitting there with your head in your hands lamenting that you should have gone to Cambridge instead of Oxford, or you should have got the bus that day you cycled to the market and got flattened by that idiot in the taxi, then you should stop fretting. In a parallel universe you did go to Cambridge and your husband’s the Prime minister. (For the sake of balance, in yet another one you are the Emperor of the Galaxy.)

Note: I may come back to this. Actually, in another universe I do come back to this and write the most brilliant philosophical piece that leads to the Nobel Prize and world peace, while you win a hundred million on the lottery.

Sorry it’s not this one.

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Different Directions

The days are different. Each day is different than any other day that has gone before – significantly different. Certain things are the same on many days but even those things are different when you zoom in on them. What does this mean? OK – elaborate. You can go into your (or any other) garden, or a park or a field, or I suppose, go and look at a roadside hedge. Choose a leaf. Study it. Go back the next day, at the same time if you like, and it will be different. It will have grown, or decomposed, or become wetter, or drier, or droopier, or perkier – and that’s just one leaf – even a rock – even a diamond will be different from one moment to the next. Some things will require a higher zoom, some things will be obvious, some things will cease to exist between one day and the next, and some things will come into existence. What does that mean? Time is the path through the tangled mess that is the universe – inner and outer (what a fucking cliché – sorry). Life is awareness, life is best when it is simply lived. Age comes to us, we move towards it – we are actually time travellers – we think we can only go in one direction – forward – but how do we know that? Answer – because we remember what has happened before and we can’t see what will happen in the future. But maybe that’s only because of the direction we’re looking in.

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Look

Rolling around – being blown – blowing – blown. I am blown through the universe – buffering – buffeting, being buffeted, blown and buffeted – through a universe of song and colour – everything – all of it, a glimpse, a snap, a snip a flash of breath, a spark, a one of them, too many clichés and the meaning is lost – too many words the same – There is, this is – a Time Space cubicle – it is in this cubicle and in the cube or is it a sphere – a ball, a world – a planet, and there under a blade of grass a chiv of life, light, feeling, and the light, the light the right, it’s all there here round and down and up and spherically shaped – - – - – - there is nothing to wait for to look for to hope for – it is here – now – the time space bubble bauble – inside and everywhere and then and now and then of course it is of course and you know it – you have to – no – should – should will – in the end discover – unearth find it always gleaming dreaming and worlds and planets and galaxies and universes and inside, deep inside – the light – the truth + time to learn and time to be and it is a start to finish / in between. So there so there it is it is there – Look.

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Was I sighing a lot then?

  • Was I sighing a lot then?
  • When?
  • Then, when I was on the computer.
  • Were you what?
  • Was I sighing – a lot?
  • Just a bit.
  • I hope I’m not like that in work.
  • Work? You hope you’re not like that in work. Ha Ha. Doesn’t matter why you’re sighing – you just don’t want to be seen sighing – in work. Ha Ha. Oh, that wouldn’t do, mustn’t be seen sighing in work. Ha Ha.
  • Oh shut up, you know what I mean.
  • Hmm.
  • I’m going to have a bath.
  • OK.
  • I need a bath. Do you want to use the bathroom?
  • No.
  • OK.

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