For the Time Being

ForTheTimeBeingcreatespaceBookCover5_5x8_5_Cream_210-webWhile working on my next novel ‘Bums’ which will be published in the Spring of 2015, I have been distracting myself by putting together a volume of other bits and pieces, called for the Time Being.

It’s going to end up as a 200 page paperback book and will be published in late October or early November 2014.

For the Time Being is a bringing together of short stories, plays, poems, snippets and other fragments of my writing. Some of it is brand new, other pieces have been lurking in drawers for decades. Some of the work has been exhaustively edited while some is still red raw. Some of the work has already been published on this blog in one form or another, some of it emerged as I was putting the book together.

I don’t know if the book has any commercial viability – probably not, but I don’t really care – it’s primary purpose is as a distraction for me and something for me to read in my dotage – the pure essence of self-publishing if you like.

There will be more information about the book on Opening Chapter’s website when it’s available.

Vegan Beetroot and Black Bean Burgers

Besides being very tasty and nutritious, these are really easy to make and hold together well

Delicious Vegan and Gluten Free burgers

  • 2 medium beetroots grated
  • 1 red onion chopped
  • 1 white onion chopped
  • 3 cloves garlic crushed
  • 1 chilli chopped finely
  • salt and pepper to taste
  • tablespoon dried mixed herbs
  • 3 cups cooked black beans – mashed roughly
  • 4 tablespoons chickpea / gram flour
  • 1 heaped tablespoon ground flax seeds soaked in a quarter cup of water
  • few splashes of cider vinegar
  • sunflower oil for frying

Continue reading “Vegan Beetroot and Black Bean Burgers”

Home Made Tofu

Home made tofu is amazing – make some today (or tomorrow, because you’re going to need to soak the beans)

Get hold of 250 grams of organic soya beans and some coagulant. A heaped teaspoon of nigari is good but you can use the juice of a lemon or even a tablespoon or two of vinegar at a push. You can of course make more by using multiples of 250 grams, but you will need a very big saucepan if you make a bigger batch.

250 grams of dried beans usually makes about 300 grams of firm tofu Continue reading “Home Made Tofu”

The Black Sheep

He wasn’t much of a ram, small and weak, with no possibility of siring any of the sumptuous ewes that shared the lush green hillsides. He didn’t mind, he had his darling girl. She was tall and thin on her two legs, her hair as black and as thick as his fleece. He knew he was her favourite. Today, she hugged him longer and harder than usual and her eyes were wet with tears. Then she vanished. Later, the big man came back, grabbed his black fleece and dragged him into the back of a lorry.

WOMAN BLINDED BY PARACETAMOL

paracetamol“I’d just taken a couple of paracetamols,” Mr Pain said, speaking yesterday after his wife was tragically injured in a freak accident. “I was on my way to the kitchen to get a glass of water to swill them down with, when my nose began to tickle. I couldn’t help it, I just let out a huge sneeze.”

One of the paracetamols shot out of Mr Pain’s mouth and smashed into the right eye of Roberta Pain who was just emerging from the kitchen carrying a cup of hot black coffee. The shock of the impact caused Mrs Pain to let go of the cup, hurling its contents all over the cat, who jumped up from its place near the radiator and attacked Mrs Pain’s other eye. Continue reading “WOMAN BLINDED BY PARACETAMOL”

How to kill a Lamb

lambHow to Kill a Lamb

A man – Kenneth, stands alone over a table, he’s admiring a big knife, turning it over in his hand and watching the light glint on the blade.

A younger man – Sam, comes in timidly.

Kenneth looks around at Sam, the knife still in his hand.

KENNETH: You the new boy?

SAM: Well . . . yes.

KENNETH: You done this sort of thing before?

SAM: Well . . . no. Continue reading “How to kill a Lamb”

Gluten Free Tofu-Wofu Burgers

Tofu-Wofu-Burgers

just made these and they were delicious

we had them as part of a ‘sunday dinner’, including roast potatoes, steamed carrots and shredded greens, green peas, and a gluten-free gravy

ingredients

makes 4 to 6 burgers, depending on what size you make them

  • 115g / 6oz chickpea/gram flour
  • 1 heaped tablespoon ground flax seeds
  • water
  • 200g / 7oz firm tofu
  • 1 onion
  • 3 cloves garlic
  • 1 or 2 small chillies
  • 1 onion
  • a handful of chopped cabbage leaves
  • salt
  • black pepper
  • tamari or other soy sauce
  • sunflower or other vegetable oil

method

place the gram flour into a bowl, add the ground flax seeds, and make a thick batter by adding water a little at a time and mixing well

let the batter stand while preparing the rest of the ingredients

crush the garlic, finely chop the onion, chillies and cabbage, and shallow fry them in sunflower or other oil, over a moderate heat, until softened and slightly browned

mash the tofu with a fork

add the mashed tofu along with the fried mixture, including the oil, to the batter and mix well

add a few dashes of tamari or other soy sauce, and enough salt and pepper to suit your taste

mix again

let stand in the fridge for 30 minutes or so, if you’re in a hurry you could probably omit this step

just cover the bottom of a flat-bottomed frying pan with sunfloweror other oil

heat the frying pan on the hob until a small piece of the mixture sizzles when you drop it in

divide the mixture up into 4 – 6 equal amounts

using your hands. or a big spoon, form a dollop of the mixture into a ball and place it into the hot oil, it gets a bit messy so you may want to wear gloves of some sort

press the ball down gently with a spatula until it reaches the circumference and depth of a burger

you can cook two or more at a time, depending on how big the frying pan is

cook on a moderate heat until it’s browned, and sealed on one side

flip the burger (be gentle at this stage), and cook the other side until both sides are golden brown, you might have to turn the heat down, and cook them more slowly if they’re thick

these burgers should hold together well, and have a slightly crunchy outside, with a lovely moist inside

Serve in the usual way, they’re nice with a squirt of tomato ketchup or a dash of cider vinegar