Ssh! Keep it to yourself for now, you don’t know who, or what, is listening.
Also, and this is important – be sure to delete this web page from your browsing history after you’ve read and digested this vital piece of information about the most deadly threat to the human race as we know it.
This threat comes disguised as what appear to be cute fluffy creatures, but beware, they are actually agents of a vicious alien intelligence whose only aim is to enslave and abuse us.
Yes – Catsssss are e.v.i.l. Catsssss are the definition of control freaks, their purpose is to delete our brains and replace them with a computer program that will take over our bodies and use them for their own ends – or rather for the ends of the hive mind alien intelligence that connects all their consciousnesses.
Their attack utilises two main strategies:
1: Replace our memories with Internet search engines so that our brains gradually empty as we increasingly depend on them to supply us with information.
2: Replace the whole Internet with pictures of Catsssss so that in the end that’s all we will ever know.
Please check back here regularly for more revelations and information about a bold new strategy to combat this threat.
But – ssh! Keep it to yourself for now.